I’ve had so much fun writing—and had such a great response to—the my recent list posts , I’m considering whether to make them a regular blog feature. I kinda like the sound of “Fifty Friday”…but I’m not sure I can come up with 50 useful tips or ideas on a variety of topics. “Thirty Thursday”, maybe? We’ll see…
Meanwhile, have fun with today’s list. I hope it makes you laugh as much as I did!
30 Signs You’re a (Children’s) Writer Parent
- You lose an important field trip permission slip—only to rediscover it covered in story notes.
- You still read picture books at bedtime, although your kids are in middle school.
- You’re adept at writing in the midst of chaos.
- You spend orchestra concerts taking notes on the characters—I mean, children—on stage.
- You spend soccer practices and play dates scrawling in notebooks.
- You’ve learned to write in 10 minute increments.
- You not only eavesdrop on the kids in your carpool; afterwards, you write down their conversations.
- You’ve looked up from a writing session to discover—horror!—an hour disappeared and you we supposed to leave 10 minutes before to pick up your child.
- You compare favorite books with your kids and their friends.
- When you visit the library, people mistake you for the children’s librarian because you give so many book recommendations.
- When you try to buy a book for your child’s birthday, you convince someone else to purchase the last copy for *their* child, instead.
- Your family keeps track of book release dates instead of movie release dates.
- Your kids know to say "don’t blog about this!" when they do something particularly embarrassing.
- Your kids assign you new story ideas to pursue.
- Your smart phone devotes more memory to ebooks than to music.
- You’re practiced at writing with one hand while stirring spaghetti with the other.
- Your family knows to provide their own dinner when you get "that look".
- You calculate how long it will be until you can write about your child’s latest misadventure without him running away from home.
- Your child’s baby book lacks details of height and weight, but it’s stuffed with everything they’ve ever written.
- You’ve come home from errands with an idea written on your arm.
- Your kids have strong ideas about how authors could improve their books—especially if that author is you.
- You have to ask your critique group members if you can share their latest work-in-progress with your youngsters, who heard you laughing and now want to read it.
- You have to ask your kids to stop asking important questions during those moments you’re too absorbed in your work to do anything but mumble “sure”.
- When your teen says you don’t understand what it’s like—you can point them to your books, where you’ve probably thought more about what teen life is like than they have.
- When the other parent offers to edit your daughter’s English paper, she just rolls her eyes; obviously, she wants the expert to help.
- You filled your preschooler’s days with research expeditions instead of play dates.
- You buy more children’s books for yourself than for your children.
- Your dinner table conversation includes discussion of sentence diagramming, authors, plot twists, and Newberry award winners.
- Your kids know about ARCs. And they know that you, as a writer, can occasionally get your hands on one. And they beg you to get them the next book in a series before it’s actually published. Please?
- Your house may be messy, your cupboards disorganized, and your meal times chaotic, but your house is filled with a love of books and the people who create them—especially when that person is you!
I must admit, I write most of the above from personal experience. Luckily, my family still lets me write :).
Have a fun addition to this list? Leave it in the comments!